When have you recently verbally attacked others and were surprised how hurtful your own words are that burst out of you in anger?
There’s nothing wrong with experiencing anger.
The question is,
- what behaviour does your anger trigger towards others?
- how come you were surprised at yourself? What happened?
- where did this unexpected flow of emotionally charged words come from?
Afterwards, you may have thought “Oh no, why did I lose control, how could I say such things to another person?”
The answer is simple: you have trained for this moment, over and over again, for years.
In your head, destructive self-talk. We all do it, some only once in a while, others almost non-stop. The EGO can be your worst enemy. It aims to take turns to put others down, or yourself.
By crushing yourself in your mind, disliking your thoughts, emotions, physical appearance of your body, you don’t help anyone. You let yourself down, and others as well. Instead of accepting your thoughts and let go of being caught up in them.
Taking a close look, observing your thoughts and retraining the way you generate your thoughts, is the road ahead – if you want to change. Coming from a place of high self-regard.
You cannot give what you don’t have. If you have low regard for others and “give it to them” on a regular basis, to the point that you hate yourself for it, start loving yourself more.
The mindset of “you are not OK, I am OK” is often a camouflage of “I am not OK”. You have become so good at it that you don’t realise it. Some call this: skilled incompetence.
But a label you give yourself does not help either. Instead, catching yourself doing it and choose to think differently does. One thought at a time. Not with grinding teeth but a gentle self-loving smile.
Room for thought.
To the ‘Undivided Leader’ in You!
Thomas & Joe